Saturday, November 17, 2012

When a thought occurs to me do I immediately act on it without considering the consequences? In what other ways do I behave compulsively?

My addiction has me well trained. I generally do not try to resist the addiction and attempt to relieve it through use as soon as it occurs. I do this because I know that resistance is futile. Too my resistance to my addiction will cause me to have psychological and physical withdrawal. If I allow the withdrawal to continue too long it will trigger a manic state. Once I'm in the manic state the results can be unpredictable. I lose my sense of what is real and I can act out in unpredictable ways. Currently I behave compulsively when it comes to my eating. I know that I am not hungry and that I am eating to feel better, but I know that resisting the urge to eat is futile and that eventually I will eat. I will sometimes want a specific thing and I have learned that for the most part it is pointless to attempt to substitute a healthy alternative. If I am obsessed with a particular food I will not be able to stop my desire to have it and I will eventually pursue it regardless of that fact that I have already eaten and feel full.

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