When did I first recognize my addiction as a problem? Did I try to correct it? If so how? If not, why not.

I recognized that I was addict when I was quite young. But it was such a huge part of me that I did not have the strength to fight it. I knew that I would have to change many aspects of my life to deal with it and I did not feel that I had the strength. I was very depressed and broken down because of the abuse that i suffered. I rationalized that the addiction made life more bearable for me while I tried to heal myself. But I did not recognize that the addiction was a monster growing inside of me, gaining strength with each hit of my pipe.